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I’ve been told on several occasions my motives are unfathomable. I often reply, not true, I just don’t always do things for the reasons people think I should do them. I am in a business fought accepted belief systems which often are not thought through, down right misguided nor intellectually challenged.

This afternoon I sat in a hotel room in Indiana with an independent escort who has had a very, very bad day. Her client was not only abusive, but in the end stole the money as well. On one hand I’m here to console her as a friend and  ‘Mentor‘ should. Yet,  I have an obligation to also tell her the truth, to help her draw the correct lessons from this situation.  There will be no winners today. At best she will take the proper lesson, one I’ve warned her about repeatedly and from this day forward do what I taught her. If she worked for me it would be different, however she works for herself and she made some poor choices.

Let’s forget victim-hood mentality for a moment, forget fault and examine actions.

Potential clients who do not, will not or wont follow rules of contact, you don’t do business with them. In short, any e-mail that says , “how do I do business with you” and that process /answer is clearly spelled out on your website, should be ignored.

Why ?

First, this is reason for having a website which clearly spells out said process.   I teach my mentoree’s if a client will not invest the time to find the answers you’ve invested the time to answer, don’t do business with them.  This is why I often post in my marketing, “spoon feeding is not a service we offer.” Today, one of my  mentoree’s (kids) as I call them, be they independent or agency owner just found out why the hard way. Continue reading How do I see you? If only it had gone the way it should have.

Individuals in this industry like so many others follow the herd in whatever direction it is going.

You see this with touring locations and routes as many independents / agencies  mimic what others do blindly hoping for some random big score. Internally we call this success by fluke factor. Sadly, this is how many of the accepted beliefs, idea and policies of this hobby came to exist. Someone had an idea, someone else copied it without bothering to understand it or think it through and before long it became gospel.  The fact  many of these beliefs lead countless numbers  like lemmings off  the cliff is irrelevant. Our society has become so invested in treating symptoms, we no longer see the actual cause of an end result.

So many escorts sites and communities  today focus on what they offer, when they offer it and for how much? When they are not dolling out  equal doses of paranoia and deception. On the surface who, what and when seems reasonable. Perhaps for them, however for me I’ve always focused on  ” the why” you should do business with me.

Why?

I find myself asking that question again of late. To be able to satisfactorily answer the question for the prospective client this is why you should do business with us.  We share basic common beliefs of honesty, deliver what you promise and strive to create memorable moments.

Why ?

Because were about as safe as you can get and you don’t need this blowing back into your life. Then again perhaps I’m over thinking this, you do business with us because you trust us.

I’m in this profession not because I have to, not because I’m forced to or lack of skill choices. I’m in this business because I enjoy the challenge and of course  hate the headaches. Like any business owner I have goal and a vision of what I want this enterprise to become and it is definitely not on the same path as the rest of the herd.

I am an unrepentant capitalist. I am a true believer in the freedom + vested self-interest = innovation.  Free market capitalism + innovation = prosperity.  Over time I have also come to understand it’s not all about profit. Somewhere in this we can’t forget about the relationship with our customers and basic rules  which govern this relationship.  Blind capitalism, without some form of ethics (why) eventually cannibalizes itself.

In our industry as with any other,  we see this manifest itself as getting what you want at any cost. We  see providers both independents and agencies deceiving and robbing clients and vice versa.  In my business we have several governing maxims one of them being:

“A good day at Dreams is not defined by the amount of money we make, but the amount of customer loyalty we create.“

What do you believe ?

Have you taken a moment to ask, what is your why?

What did you learn ?

Life is a road so be good to your follow travelers and walk in peace ladies and gentlemen.

Lee ^

You have to love this women. I admire her ingenuity and it’s fun to watching  women give her a hate fest because of it.

I’m at the point in my life where I not only must listen to music during sex,
but it has to be the live concert version.

This way, I get applause every 3 to 4 minutes.

Lee Dreams~

Wow, does this conversation sound “familiar” ?

[Client comments are unedited and uncorrected for spelling nor punctuation. You may make your comments in the comment section below. I welcome your comments, you will need to register to make them. ]

One of the many business sayings which have proven themselves   is 10% of your customer base generates 90% of your income. In reality this  is true for a lot of human interaction if you really think about it.

When I get the rare complaint from a customer I always  evaluate if they have a valid point.  In traditional business it is written for every one complaint you have six other customers who feel the same way. What that assumption doesn’t tell you, is it the 16% of the 10% who generate 90% of your revenue or the 80% who don’t?  Those of you who own a retail business you will be familiar with the phenomena of   customers who are paying the least amount of money, complain the loudest. Thus,  I think it’s the latter.

Customer complaints are best handled in private and worked toward a resolution. Frankly, we DON’T get a lot of them, however when I do I address them. I don’t recall ever doing what I’m about to do. However,  this complaint hits upon a few areas I feel needs to be addressed with all of you.  Did he hit a nerve? Yes, however not for the reasons one would think. I would like to thank the clients who helped me put this all in prospective and gave me reality check regarding the  matter.

Last week in the private newsletter I addressed a few less than politically correct topics which from time to time we need to confront.  The first being hygiene, “shit, shower shave”, the rest being rules, expectations,  a comment about Backpage and my hiring practices. My long time readers know, when it comes to a customer newsletters, I break all the established rules.  Political correctness when appropriate,  however  the rest of the time, not my style. Below is a response to last week’s newsletter.

Lee, While I appreciate all of your emails and opinions, I think your rules and prices are prohibitive particularly in this economy.  Furthermore, to call escorts who advertise on backpage wenches, sluts, etc. is obnoxious.   Independent escorts, like all people are all different, and it is unfair to sterotype them.  In fact, they are the enterpreneurs in your business.  Why do adult providers even need an agency or the middle man?   You must charge more because your agency must take the fee and also pay the provider.  Independent escorts cut all that out.  Please remove me from your client base, not because of your fine providers, but because of your obnoxious opinions and rediculous political discourse.  There is nothing wrong with backpage by the way.  You just don’t like them because they are competition.  Continue banning clients and not accepting providers because of all your rules and you will be out of business!

Let’s take this head on shall we?

1)       I target a very specific psychological and demographic profile for our client base which out of the available market we estimate to be only about 30% percent. This means I deliberately disregard the other 70% of the market and I have good reasons for it. This is a conversation for another time.  Based upon the nature of your complaint, the last time we did business was in 2008, when DivineCompanions had a $250.00 hour outcall rate, if I recall. Clearly, you’re an economical focused buyer always in search of a bargain and by itself, nothing wrong with that. Who doesn’t love a good deal?

2)      “Furthermore, to call escorts who advertise on backpage wenches, sluts, etc. is obnoxious.   Independent escorts, like all people are all different, and it is unfair to sterotype them.  In fact, they are the enterpreneurs in your business.  “

Clearly you’ve missed the whole point  about my comments about Backpage.  Backpage  is a metaphoric  symbol for the lowest common denominator of our industry. When I mention backpage or backpage provider that is what I’m referring to. Also get your facts straight, what I said was:

“To be exceedingly blunt, these are not cheap Backpage wenches ( I was really thinking of another word that begins with a W).  The reason you pay higher prices with us is for the quality, consistency and safety. There are more “economical” options however you must ask yourself, is it worth the extra stress playing Russian roulette for a bargain?”

Where in that did I specifically malign independents because Agencies and Dreams have advertised on Backpage?   There are good people on Backpage, however it still doesn’t change the fact,  in my opinion this particular advertising vehicle is representative of the lowest common denominator.  Yet, as a single tool in a large marketing tool box, I’ll use them for a very specific purpose or project if need be.  Tools are tools, even the one you don’t think highly of. The fact you’re actually going to try to defend mediocrity, and make no mistake that is what you are doing, is more proof; you’re not my target audience.

3)      Why do adult providers even need an agency or the middle man?   You must charge more because your agency must take the fee and also pay the provider.  Independent escorts cut all that out.

This is in reference in part to my newsletter comment   “we are expensive”.  I was referring to other agencies in comparison not independents.  Continue reading Customer Complaint: After much consideration, I stand by my business model

The question was posed in a discussion:

How do powerful and elite of DC use escort services?

I am guessing the ones that have been around and charges at least $300 – 500?

I want to start using one of these more UP-SCALE ones. Let me know!

~ Anonymous

-

Dear Anonymous

Let me begin to answer your question by using a metaphor.

A man walks by a pool and stops to look at a swimmer. The swimmer says come on in the waters fine. The spectator says are you mad?! I would never consider swimming in a pool  on a 45 degree day such as  this and walks off. The swimmer shrugs and says to himself, I wouldn’t either unless it was a heated pool such as this.

Sometimes, unless you’re a swimmer in the pool there are conditions you  can not perceive.

You asked:  “..do powerful and elite of DC, use escort services?

Yes,  more than any of you know.

Let me clue you in on a hidden reality of this pool. Continue reading The powerful, the elite and DC Escort agencies

From an April 2012 E-mail newsletter

The escort industry is in the middle of generational and business paradigm shift. Many of the old principles are discarded by this new 10 second sound bite generation and being replaced with a quick and easy mentality. Practically every little gutter rat ( Oh I’m sorry was I not being politically correct?) wants to call herself  “upscale”  in her Backpage ad  all the while confusing the vernacular of texting with proper speech. This is an insult to the independents out there who do classify as “upscale” and who are professional whether they advertise on Backpage or not. In short, professionalism and principles are now considered an anachronism to a growing segment of the market. It has been a challenge maintaining my standards in the current climate and to the best of my ability we will continue to do so. Yet, even I must concede in the war against mediocrity one must retreat on few fields of battle, to stay in the war.

Since the beginning, I have gone out of my way to maintain hiring standards especially when it came to tattoos. I don’t know what it is about this new generation however in the last year the incidences of applicants with tattoos has continued to rise. For those of you who are new, I only interview about Continue reading The trend of Tattoos, asking clients what they thought.

As with any industry there are classic on going debates over a myriad of subjects. You have one group which takes the view that use of all social media is wrong and risky.  Then you have another who swears by it. Where do I stand in this on going debate?

Within an absolute mental frame work of reality I could agree with the  prospective social media is a bad idea, however I don’t. First of all, I’m not an absolute thinker and few things in life are absolute.  We’ve used social media rather successfully, however the latter comparison  is an end result.  Yet, an end result is not a process.

In my operational philosophy, successful  use of social media sites especially Twitter requires attention to the HOW more than the WHAT you do.

You can use twitter safely and successfully as long as you take into account several things:

1) What is your client contact and screening process?
Is it a lose as a Goose, based on your gut instinct and you feeling  he /she doesn’t sound like a state employee?  Do you go by a vouching system (ie provider references) or by a very strict background check verification method? Never lose sight the easier it is to see you, the higher risk pool you are swimming in.

2) Is your phone number on your ads and  you take late night calls or do instant appointments?  If you answered yes to all three   I would tend to suggest twitter may be a bad idea.

3) Is your face visible in your photos?
If they are, then it would be easy for any hotel clerk to recognize you especially if they are asked and shown a photo in an official capacity accompanied by a $50.00 to $100.00 bill.

All the above has everything to do with your business process.

First  maintain stringent business requirements , then limit the specific information you publish. Make sure all photos are face blocked and never say something stupid like : “I’m doing  lunch with me and 10 clients at the Homewood Suites in Tysons corner VA“  and you should be fine.  Be certain all accounts are done under a consistent business e-mail with absolutely no cross ties to any personal accounts. Never say anything in a tweet you wouldn’t  on a public board or could be legally used against you. Remember, once something is Tweeted, there is NO pulling it back. The internet as they say is forever. Do not succumb to the delusion you can just delete it and it goes away. Numerous Celebrities have learned the hard way, that is a false and delusional hope.

One last thing, and this is a personal pet peeve for me. I have NO respect for providers and agencies who throw themselves at celebrities. Case in point a California provider who constantly tweets several male stars trying to entice them in hopes of a future date.

To her I say:
“Honey,  you’re 40 but give it up, George C and Charlie S have 20 and 30 somethings offering it up with a hard pelvic thrust for free. The only thing you’re doing is making yourself look desperate the rest of us look professional.”

To each their own.

Lee Dreams
“It’s all about integrity”

(Click on the dog photo to enlarge)

No it’s not a photo of a new hire however I will admit after speaking with her for over an hour face to face I found my self wanting to say the caption to her. Those of you who are employers and take the time to personally interview your applicants you may relate to what I am about to say.

Is it just me {rhetorical question } or have they stopped teaching critical thinking in public schools? When did common sense go MIA? Hang on while I make a phone call and see if we can have an Amber Alert issued for it! Truth can only be proven by results and what does this say about our educational system. It seems the ability to reason things out is no longer a skill to be attained and honed. This new generation literally needs everything spoon fed to them including, often times the logical conclusion.

Then there are the applications I receive with lack of capitalization, spelling or punctuation. I often make mistakes therefore, I’m not a grammar Nazi. However what I’m talking about is scary especially from middle class educated (supposedly) college women in their mid 20′s into their 30′s. It would seem no one has instructed them a job application is to be taken seriously.

I was taught, “thank you mom”, dress appropriately when:

1. Going to your house of worship
2. Going to a wedding.
3. Attending a formal dinner party
4. Going before a Judge, Magistrate or loan officer.
5. Job interviews.

You don’t arrive 20 minutes late to an interview because you didn’t look up the address, learn the time needed to get there, nor print out or write down the directions. You don’t wear jean shorts and platform stripper heels to a restaurant showing off your thigh tattoos you’re so proud of . Of course failing that, I’ve had women show up in 40 degree weather in jeans and flip flops with way too much glitter eye make up. In one case, it would have been a better mercy if she had arrived in a snake skin mini with a look that says; “Hi I’m still a 90′s hair band Rock groupie”, and I’m 35.

I’m not going to apologize for my standards, however it is getting harder and harder to find women who meet them. Our industry is in the middle of a generational shift and the next generation is here and it’s not pretty. If anything we’re sliding backwards and some guys see it as a price issue and are joyful. Yet the issue is larger than that. If a woman or anyone you do business with has low standards, low integrity and will compromise their rules for more money, do you really think this is not going to blow back on you at some point?

Good people are hard to find. Once upon a time it was a cliche, these days, it’s a simple truth for employers.